Keeping the vision out front

I really try to make an effort to share the good in my children and my family, especially on this blog. I would hate for our little family blog to become a place of venting. That's what my prayer journal is for :) But there are a few areas lately at "Camp Goulet" that are not so smooth. These are mainly the boys sharing a bedroom, and leaving the baby with babysitters. The boys have been sharing a bedroom at night for a few weeks now, and the transition is not going as smoothly as I had hoped. Before they shared a room night time was easy, they each were put in their room and they fell asleep on their own. Since they have been sharing a room we follow the same routine only now it includes Nathan being put to bed, then mommy sitting and nursing the baby before putting him in bed. After I leave the room the boys "talk" to each other then they seem to take turns waking each other up. This lasts about an hour each night. This hour is filled with me watching the video monitor, and going back in to soothe Elijah when necessary. When they finally fall asleep, I usually look at Daniel and say "Why are we doing this again?" Admittedly things are getting better, Nathan no longer wakes up when I go in to feed Elijah in the early morning and both boys sleep until their normal wake up time. With any struggle I keep having to ask God to help me keep the vision of WHY I am doing something. I do this because in the midst of making several trips upstairs each night I often want to throw in the towel and move them back to their separate rooms. If I loose the thought of WHY I am doing something I tend to just stop doing it. I have to remember that walking down the stairs in the middle of the night to feed Elijah is not fun. I have to remember that children are capable of sharing the same sleeping space. I have to remember that I want to have a guest room in my house. I have to remember that this time next year when the boys will already used to sharing a room they can both be in their bunk beds and have a hopefully peaceful bedtime. The same thing goes for Mr. Elijah, he doesn't seem to be a fan of going to sleep at night with a bottle and a babysitter. And I really try to keep this to one night a week. And even today I am so tempted to take him with on Daniel and my date night. I have to remember WHY I do this. I have to remember that I value the freedom of being able to leave him when I need to. I have to remember that I value date night in my marriage and I need to have alone time with my husband. I have to remember that he is with me literally all day and night (he still comes to work with me) and taking a few hours away is good for me. I have to remember that our babysitter is great and responsible and has watched Nathan once a week for over a year and we've never had a problem. Things will get better and in a few weeks these bumps in the road will be a thing of the past. Until then, I need to keep the vision of why I am doing something in my head.